Musannaf Ibn Abi Shayba 33:1188

Husayn ibn Ali narrated to us from Mis'ar, who said: Zayd al-'Ammi gave me a book in which it was written that a man advised his son, saying: "O my son, let your distance from those you distance yourself from be with certainty and integrity, and your closeness to those you draw near to be with gentleness and mercy. He is not arrogant or haughty, and his closeness is not deception or treachery. He does not hasten in what makes him suspicious, and he pardons those who are gentle toward him. He is not deceived by the praise of those who do not know him, and he does not forget to account for what he has done. If he is mentioned, he fears what they say and seeks forgiveness for what they do not know. He says: 'My Lord knows me better than I know myself, and I know myself better than others.' He asks in order to learn, he sets out in order to gain, he remains silent in order to be safe, and he mingles in order to understand. If he is among the heedless, he is recorded among the rememberers; he is not recorded among the heedless, because he remembers when they are heedless, and he does not forget when they remember." Husayn said: Ibn 'Uyaynah added to it: "He mixes knowledge with forbearance; his asceticism regarding what perishes is like his desire for what remains."